I start my day slow because my body likes it that way. For about a year now I’ve been walking in the mornings. I like to do it early before most humans wake up. My neighborhood is normally pretty quiet which I’m grateful for, but catching the sunrise is a whole other type of quiet.
I love connecting to nature and wildlife. I get to see muskrats in a nearby pond gathering their breakfast, swimming back and forth. I find myself smiling as I watch them carrying a lily pad in their mouth. It’s like they’re harvesting one by one, collecting their feast. Sometimes I catch a glimpse of a solitary heron before my presence spooks it and it flys off with a slow grace. Each day is different and brings its own surprises. I take a moment to stretch while taking in the pond view before heading on my path.
This morning I was gifted the sight of a hawk flying above me. It looked like it was playing... dipping and diving, soaring and flying in the open sky. It brought a smile to my face, guiding me toward joy. What a way to start my day in awe and connection.
I carry on walking and start feeling some hip pain on my left side. I’ve had tension there on and off throughout my life but lately it’s turned into actual pain. I personally believe my emotions are deeply felt there. I also have old trauma that seems to be carried there — and I trust my body wisely knows when it’s safe enough to release. I’ve been giving my hips some undivided attention this last year. Stretching my tight muscles has helped. Gentle movement has helped. Walking helps.
Hips don’t lie.
As I keep walking, I realize I’m going at a faster pace than I feel comfortable with today. I’ve learned over the years that I’m the expert on my own body. Will I pay attention and listen to its cues? That is the question. I decide to listen and slow down.
When I think about it, my body really has no other way to communicate other than pain and dis-ease. Humans tend to want quick fixes and instant healing, but that’s often not how it works. Maybe symptoms are signals that alert us to needing extra care and support.
This morning though… my hip pain was trying to get my attention. And quite frankly, it was kind of scaring me. I tried something different and put my hand on it as I slowed down my pace. I took deep breaths with longer exhales to help soothe my nervous system. I connected to that pain and tried to visualize it, sending it love and support. I see you. I feel you. I’m here for you. The pain lessened and before I knew it, it was gone. For the moment.
I instantly thought of my recovery journey. How in early recovery I just wanted relief and to be “healed.” I wanted to get better fast but the journey is slow. Now I relish in the slowness, most of the time. When I don’t it’s usually a signal that I’m super stressed so in that nervous system state of fight or flight, my body needs to feel supported to help it shift back to feeling at ease.
Since that morning, I’ve started doing daily physical therapy exercises - a simple routine to warm up and stretch my hip muscles (pelvic floor area). It’s been helping and gave me pain relief pretty quickly. I feel some pretty intense tightness there sometimes which makes sense to me given my history of childhood sexual abuse. I use other gentle wellness tools, like practice slow flow yoga, massage and chiropractic care. The design and function of the human body and its capacity for healing amazes me.
My hip pain experience during that morning walk was a reminder that my walks help me attune to my body. I get to know myself over and over, every day - moment by moment. They help me slow down and be present. I’m guided to listen to what my body is trying to communicate in a peaceful gentleness — mindful walking can be meditative. I’m usually surrounded by bird song and majestic trees so that helps too. As I write this, I’m thinking well, no wonder I cherish my walks. I crave their sweet nourishment.
My early morning walks have become a sacred way to start my day.
Recovery from the impact of multiple childhood trauma and years of living with chronic stress takes time. It’s a journey, a practice of daily self-attunement to my unique needs moment by moment. Trauma often disconnects us from our bodies. For me, it’s been empowering to reconnect and reclaim my body.
Whether you’re just starting on your wellness journey or have been on it for a while, my hope is that reading this encourages you to celebrate how far you’ve come, continue learning about yourself, or maybe inspires curiosity around your wellness tools — early morning walks or not. We all deserve wellness and long term recovery. I believe you can thrive.
Sending you survivor love + healing vibes,
Viv